


An Affinity for Hate

by Voidof



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Eventual Happy Ending, First Time, M/M, Tears, sebastian being an arse, virgin grell
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-24
Updated: 2016-06-02
Packaged: 2018-03-14 21:40:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3426503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Voidof/pseuds/Voidof
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Grell is distraught after finding that Ronald and William are together. But who can help Grell after such heart break. NEW CHAPTER ADDED. New new chapter added. Only one more to go.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Heart Break

**Author's Note:**

> Okay this is only the second thing I have posted and is the first real fanfic for me. Please leave comments. Criticisms welcome.

   "Will-i-am," a high-pitched effeminate voice yelled out. Grell Sutcliff came running into his bosses office, slamming the door open without so much as bothering to knock. Running around the desk Grell made to hug William, but the other reaper was quick to knock him down. "So cold Will," Grell pouted from where he sat on the ground. Will sighed as he pushed up his glasses with his scythe.

"How many times must I tell you to knock before entering, and don't call me that," he said in a stern voice.

"But I just had to come see you darling. Did you miss me?" Grell chimed, jumping up off the ground and into Williams personal space, completely unfazed from being knocked to the ground.

"Actually I was quite enjoying your absence (even if it was only an hour). Have you finished your paper work?" Will asked knowing he would be disappointed by the answer.

"Willy your so mean," Grell whined ignoring the question entirely.

"Of course not. Why would I have even thought otherwise?" Will questioned exasperated. 

"But Wiiiiiill, paperwork is soo boring," he complained in a whiny tone, still standing way to close to William.

"You never do your work! You're a lazy and completely useless as a reaper!" William shouted, in a rare show of emotion (read:anger). William reached out and hit Grell on the head with his scythe, as punishment for not completing his paperwork. Grell stood in William's office staring at him with tears welling in his eyes.

H-he was a good reaper, he really was, Grell thought. How could Will be so mean as to say something like that. Grell had spent the last century pinning after Will. William was his one true love, and after spending decades showering Will in love, kindness, and affection, what does he get in return? Grell gets hit over the head, hard. It just wasn't fair. 

"Get out of my office and go do your work," William said sharply, interrupting Grell's train of thought, pointing to the door with his scythe, gesturing for Grell to get out. Grell turned and fled the office, running to his own. Once he reached his office Grell ran inside and slammed the door. Why was everyone so mean to him? Hehad heard the laughter of his co-workers as he ran down the hall, distraught. Sitting down in a corner in his office Grell began to cry. 

"Grell-senpai," a young voice called from outside Grell's office minutes later.

"Go away," Grell sniffled. He didn't want Ronnie to see him like this; upset and crying with makeup running down his face. After hearing Grell's tear filled voice Ronald entered the office anyway. Seeing Ronnie, Grell shuffled farther into the corner and hid his face. "Go away," Grell cried again, desperate to be left alone. 

"What's wrong Senpai," Ronald questioned walking over to Grell. He was worried about his Senpai. It was bad if his normally happy, chipper mentor was reduced to tears. 

"Will," Grell croaked out. His voice was sore from crying. Ronald could guess what had happened. It was no secret that Grell loved Will and had been pinning for him for years (although with no success). It was also no secret that William couldn't stand the annoying read-headed reaper. Sitting down next to his mentor Ronald wrapped an arm around him.

"What did he say," Ronald asked , trying to get his Senpai to calm down. 

"He said that I was a useless reaper, and a good for nothing," Gell sniffed.

"And why would he say something like that," Ronnie questioned. Though Ronald felt bad for Grell, he knew that William was probably right in saying what he did. Everyone knew that Grell NEVER did his work, and was always making messes for William to clean up, causing him overtime most nights.

"I-I didn't finish my paperwork," Grell stuttered out.

"Well maybe if you complete all your work now and turn it into William, you could prove that you are a good grim reaper." Ronald suggested.

"Ronnie you're a genius," Grell exclaimed jumping up and throwing his arms around him in a tight hug. "Thank you Ronnie. I'm going to show Will just how good a reaper I really am and prove him wrong. Maybe whe  he sees how well I can do my work he will like me more," Grell shouted happily, releasing Ronald he ran over to his desk, pen flying across the paper as he rushed to get it done. Two hours later and Grell had finished the huge stack of paperwork that littered his desk. Grell was so excited to sbow Will what he had done. For once Grell knew that when he walked into that office he wouldn't see disappointment in Will's eyes, but approval. Maybe William would even be proud of him for doing so much work in such a short amount of time. Gathering up all the papers in his slender arms, Grell rushed out of his office and made his way towards Will's. Running up to the door of Will's office, Grell threw the door open wide, not bothering to knock. He wished he had knocked. Oh how he wished he had. There inside the office was William T. Spears. That was fine, the man he was snogging however, was not. Ronald Knox, the boy Grell considered his one friend, was there pushing William up against the desk snogging the life out of him.

"What the hell," Grell screamed, alerting the couple to his presence I  the doorway.

"Grell!" They both exclaimed at the same time; Ronald out of fear, and William in annoyance.

"Get out Grell," William said with an exasperated sigh.

"No, I'm not leaving. How could you?" Grell screamed addressing both men with the last question. 

"Grell you don't understand-" Ronald began before getting interrupted.

"What don't I understand? That my best friend and the love of my life betrayed me and are sleeping together. Cause that's what it looks like to me." Grell shouted throwing his stack of papers in the general direction of the desk.

"Shut up," William yelled, slamming his hand down on the desk. "I do NOT like you, okay. You are SO annoying. All you ever do is flounce about causing trouble. You never do your work, and constantly interrupt me while I do mine. Now yes me and Ronald are together. You need to get this through that thick skull of yours, deal with it, and leave us ALONE!" William finished his rant glaring daggers at the tearful redhead standing in the doorway. 

"Ronnie," Grell whimpered seeking comfort from her only friend.

"He's right you k ow. He could have said it nicer but Will is right. You need to get over this crush. He doesn't love you ." Ronald sighed. He didn't want to hurt Grell, but damn it, it needed to be said. Grell had been pinning after William for so long, and it was doing nothing but annoying William, and himself. Bursting into waterworks, Grell moved towards Will and Ronald.

"B-but," Grell cried reaching out a hand. 

"You need to leave," Will said coldly unaffected by the tears. Grell ran once again from the room. This time running right into one of his co-workers. Sending them both to the ground.

"Watch where you're going Slutciff," the other reaper said in a cruel mocking tone.

 

 


	2. A Promising Friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long to update. I was busy with final exams. Please forgive me, and enjoy this new chapter. Reviews welcomed.

Getting up and running Grell creates a portal and leaves the shinigami realm. Landing in the human world in London, Grell finds himself in some back alley. Grell thinks the dingy, dark surroundings suit his mood, so he crawls down the alley to curl up in the dark. He didn't know what to do. His only friend betrayed him in a most hurtful manner by sleeping with Grell's love. If Grell could even call William that. Will only ever treated Grell with contempt and hate no matter how Grell expressed his love for the other man. What was one supposed to do in a situation pilfer this? Curling himself tighter into he fetal position Grell let out his anguish onto the cold, dirty pavement below him.

"And just what are you doing here," the stern voice of a child rung out through the alley way, sounding annoying having run into Grell. Grell looked up from his puddle of misery to stare into the lone eye of Ciel Phantomhive. Pulling himself upright into a sitting position, Grell began to look around for Sebast-chan. Sebby was handsome, and Grell liked him well enough. Maybe he would return Grell's affections and love him, or at the very least be kind to him. Seeing Sebast-chan standing behind his master as always; Grell got excited. Jumping up ignoring both the ache in his body from the hard ground, and Girl's question. Grell ran towards Sebast-chan and glomped him.

"You're so handsome Sebast-chan," Grell giggled happily, having a severe mood change from the tears before. 

"Please remove yourself from my person. You're revolting," Sebastian said attempting to shake the redhead off. The crimson haired reaper just clung tighter to Sebast-chan, ignoring his cruel words. Sebastian was quickly getting annoyed with Grell. 

"Grell," Ciel's harsh voice echoed loudly, "unhand my butler.....NOW." Grell continued tonignored Ciel,but would soon regret that decision. "Sebastian, get rid of that thing," Ciel ordered in a voice filled with disgust. Finally hearing Ciel, Grell looked up in fright at Sebastian, Knowing what would come next.

"Yes my lord," Sebastian said giving a slight bow to Ciel, before looking down at Grell with a menacing, terrifying smile. Grell backed away from Sebastian as fast as he could. But before Grell could summon his death scythe Sebastian was there towering over him. In the blink of an eye Grell was smashed into the alley wall. Sebastian was brutal; he didn't even give Grell a chance to move before he was beating the shite out of him. grell stood crying and trying to fight back but it was no use: without his death scythe Grell was helpless. Knocking him to the ground Sebastian began to kick Grell hard, aiming for his face and chest. After a few vicious kicks Grell was crying hard, and trying to protect his face with his arms, but it was to no avail. Grell whimpered as he felt several of his ribs crack under Sebastian's shoe. One violent kick even snapping Grell's left arm. Finally what seemed like hours later when Grell was nothing more than a bloody lump on the pavement. Sebastian and his young master took their leave; returning to whatever important mission for the queen they were on before being interrupted by a certain reaper. When Grell finally caught his breath he tried to stand, only to have his breath leave him again when he crashed back down to to the ground. "Damn," Grell cursed, crying. It hurt. Everything hurt. He didn't want to move but knew he had to. These injuries were severe even for a death god and would need medical help. Forcing himself up, Grell limped down the alley way, using the wall as support. Grell wondered where he would go now. He needed help but felt he couldn't return to the shinigami realm; not yet, not after what had just occurred there. Besides its not like he had anyone there that would care if he was hurt. When Grell finally reached the end of the alley way he realized he was near the Undertaker's shop. Grell really didn't want to go there, but what choice did he have, he felt ready to collapse any second. Once Grell reached the door to Undertaker's shop Grell stopped, standing at the door. Grell found himself to scared to knock. All he could think of was the last time he was here. Grell had woken up in a coffin only to be called ugly and frightful by Undertaker. Grell had then throttled Undertaker and buried him in a pot of salt. Would Undertaker even want to see him after that, let alone help him? Grell was so scared he was starting to feel weak. Or maybe that was the blood loss? Still Grell found himself to scared to knock, afraid of being laughed at and mocked. It wasn't long though before that choice was taken from him. Undertaker suddenly opened the door interrupting Grell's train of thought. "U-u-um," Grell stuttered, not knowing what to say, having been caught lurking in the doorway. "Kehehehe," Undertaker laughed, finding amusement in Grell's loss of words. Grell flinched at the sound of Undertaker's laugh. I knew this was a bad idea Grell thought disheartenedly. Grell looked down at his feet not saying anything and refusing to look at Undertaker. "Are you alright my dear? Come inside and have some tea," Undertaker said finally noticing that something was wrong with the normally happy, flamboyant reaper. Shocked by the sudden change in Undertaker's personality, going from mocking to caring, Grell meekly followed him inside. Grell didn't answer Undertaker's question though, instead leaving it hanging in silence. Leading Grell inside, the Undertaker wondered what could have made the dear so sad and sullen. Unlike what Grell thought, Undertaker did actually like him. Grell was fun and entertaining. Everyone else was always to afraid of the Undertaker to even have a conversation with him. Grell though was confidant enough to talk to him, even going as far as to bury him in salt. Undertaker always enjoyed Grell's company, and hoped they could be considered friends. Though you wouldn't believe it Undertaker actually got lonely sometimes. Sometimes Undertaker wished for the company of the the living, who unlike that of the dead could speak back. Coming out of his thoughts Undertaker led Grell to a near by coffin. "Please have a seat my dear," Undertaker said, before wandering over and flicking on the lights, brightening the normally dim shop. Finally able to see properly, Undertaker turns to get a better look at Grell. What he sees shocks him. Grell is covered in blood and bruises. "Come with me dearie," Undertaker said in a soft kind voice as to not scare Grell. Grell went to stand but his knees gave out and he went crashing to the ground. Grell closed his eyes bracing himself for impact and was surprised when he didn't hit the ground. Opening his eyes he saw that the Undertaker had caught him, keeping him from smashing into the ground. "Thank you," Grell muttered, hands clenching in the other man's coat to keep himself upright. Undertaker nodded in return and gently helped Grell to the bedroom in the back of the shop and on through into the ensuite bathroom. "Would you mind letting me tend to your wounds my lady." Undertaker asked, setting Grell down on the edge of the bathtub. "Please," Grell whimpered desperate for some form of relief. He just wanted the pain to stop. His entire body ached something terrible. "Okay what's hurting you the most? We will start there," Undertaker asked so he would know where to start. "My chest," Grell cried softly a stabbing pain shooting through his ribs with each breath. "I'm going to have to take off your shirt. Is that okay," Undertaker asked gesturing towards Grell's top half. Grell just nodded, wanting the pain to stop. Undertaker carefully untied the bow at Grell's neck before unbuttoning his waistcoat and shirt in the same gentle manor; being espescialy careful with Grell's broken arm. Once Grell's chest was revealed Undertaker gasped in shock. Grell's entire chest was covered in a mass of scrapes and cuts, with dark bruising covering both torso and arms. It was a sickening sight; how could someone have hurt this sweet rose this badly? It must be extremely painful and Undertaker winced in sympathy. He needed to catalog all broken bones before tending to anything else. "I need to check for broken ribs," Undertaker told Grell gently "It is going to hurt." "Okay," Grell said tightly gripping the edge of the tub where he sat. He squeezed his eyes shut in preparation of the pain. Undertaker began to prod at Grell's ribs; testing each one, pushing lightly against it to see if it was broke. With each press of the Undertaker's hands Grell let out a small cry. "It hurts," Grell whimpered in pain, struggling to breath. "Shhhh dearie. It's okay, I'm almost done. It will be over soon," Undertaker cooed softly trying to comfort the distressed reaper. It wasn't enough though and the redheaded reaper slumped forward in Undertaker's arms, unconscious. Undertaker was actually glad the poor dear passed out. It meant he wouldn't have to feel it when he reset his bones. Shuffling Grell around in his arms Undertaker managed to take off his coat and place it on the ground as a makeshift pillow. Undertaker the gently lowered Grell onto the ground and got to work tending to the rest of Grell's wounds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: next chapter will contain smut. If you don't like that kinda thing just know the story ends with Grell and the Undertaker getting together.


	3. A blossoming love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey sorry for the long wait. Also I've changed it so now there is going to be 4 chapters instead of three.

When Grell wakes up he is lying in a soft bed that wasn't his own. As Grell looked down at himself he realized that all the blood had been cleaned up and all his wounds bandaged. His arm had even been set and wrapped in a tightly in a makeshift cast. Grell slowly began to remember everything that had happened. He remembered being attacked by Sebastian and Undertaker helping him. Thinking about Undertaker, Grell began to wonder where he was. Sitting up carefully, Grell swung his legs over the edge of the bed noticing for the first time that he was dressed in a large shirt of the Undertakers. And nothing else. 

"Ahhhhh," Grell shrieked in a loud, high pitched voice. When he realised that Undertaker had undressed him. He was so embarrassed. He was supposed to be a lady, and letting a strange man see his private parts was very unlady-like. And even more embarrassing seeing as he had a penis instead of the female parts he so longed for. Having heard Grell's scream Undertaker emerged in the the doorway.

"What's wrong dearie," he asked in a concerned voice. Grell blushed and gestured at his state of undress. Coming around th3 bed to stand close to where Grell was sitting, Undertaker reached out and grabbed one of Grell's hands holding it in his own. "I'm sorry, but I had to bandage the rest of your wounds. I swear I completed the task as a complete gentleman. I would NEVER take advantage of you like that," Undertaker said moving his hair to the side and looking straight into Grell's eyes. Looking at him closely Grell decided that he believed Undertaker.

"Thank you for helping me," Grell said still blushing in embarrassment. 

"Of course, dearie," Undertaker replied. "What kind of man would I be if I didn't help a lady when she was in distress."

Grell leaned forward and wrapped arms around Undertaker in a hug. "Thank you." Grell whispered again. When Undertaker returned the hug instead of pushing him away Grell was shocked. Even though Undertaker had treated her with nothing but kindness Grell had still expected to be shoved away, just as she was by every other man in her life. Suddenly feeling overwhelmed Grell pushed her face against Undertaker's chest and began crying softly.

"What's wrong." Undertaker asked alarmed, as he heard Grell start crying.

"Your so nice," Grell whimpered hugging Undertaker closer. After being turned down and rejected by every man she loved, having undertaker treat her with such kindness was overwhelming. 

"Of course dearie, I have to reason to treat such a beautiful rose as you, cruelly," Undertaker said holding Grell closer. The poor dear, undertaker thought, she must have been through something horrible for simple kindness to reduce the normally confident reaper to crying hysterically. Undertaker began trying to think of a way to ask about what happened without upsetting the dear more than she already was. 

Grell gasped. Beautiful? Undertaker thought she was beautiful? Grell was already experiencing strong feelings for the Undertaker but that cinched it. Undertaker was perfect or at least he was in Grell's mind. He was kind, thought she was pretty, and treated her like a decent reaper, not to mention underneath that mop of hair Undertaker was sexy as hell. Damn it Grell thought to herself. She always fell for men hard and fast. It was her downfall, and after what she had just been through she wasn't sure if she could handle another rejection.

"Grell?" Undertaker questioned, bringing Grell out of her thoughts. When Grell looked up Undertaker she saw compassion in his eyes. "Would you like to tell little ol' Undertaker what happened?" He asked trying to lighten the mood while at the same time get to the bottom of why Grell was injured. Grell worried his bottom lip, a nervous habit Grell had developed over the years.

Slowly Grell nodded, taking deep breaths to work up the courage to begin his story. 

While Grell tearfully recounted his tale of what happened, Undertaker's heart slowly broke for the other reaper. Once Grell finished his story, Undertaker moved forwards to embrace him. "You deserve better than that." He told Grell in a stern but soft voice.

Grell looked up at Undertaker only to be greeted with his lips on hers. Grell's eyes widened in surprise.

After a few moments Undertaker pulled back. "Would you allow me to show you how a true lady should be treated." he asked softly. Grell just nodded, shocked into silence that this handsome man would want a freak like her when so many others had turned her down. 

Undertaker smiled and picked up Grell's uninjured hand placeing a kiss across her knuckles. When Grell smiled happily at him Undertaker couldn't resist the happy look on Grells lips and leaned in for another kiss, this time swiping his tounge across Grell's bottom lip. 

Grell moaned into the kiss, softly pulling Undertaker closer. "Undy," Grell moaned softly into the kiss. Feeling better than she could ever remeber despited her injuries.

Undertaker broke this kiss pulling back to speak. "Now now, none of that my dear. I promised to be a gentleman. We wouldn't want to cause you anymore harm by disturbing your injuries with to vigourous of activites now would we." Undertaker said not wanting to rush his beautiful rose into anything so soon after such a painful rejection from Willaim and Sebastian. He knew Grell was likely to be emotionally unstable at the moment, amd while he would very much like to bed her, Undertaker knew it would be wrong fro him to do so tonight.

Undertaker stood moving to leave the room. " I know you just woke, but its late my dear. You should rest." 

As Undertaker moved to leave the room Grell panicked. She was afraid that if he left now it would all feel like at dream. That his kindess would end and the kiss would have only been her imagination. "Please stay," Grell begged in a quite voice. "Just can you stay with me for the rest of the night?" Grell asked shyly. 

Undertaker nodded before taking off his outer robes and his shoes, to slip into bed wearing his t-shirt and pants. "Is that better my dear?" Undertaker question once in bed, knowing Grell was likely needing him there to feel safe so soon after such a visous attack.

Grell yawned and noddes before cuddling close to him and drifting off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've noticed that I changed pronoums for Grell. I thought I should explain. I see Grell as both male and female a different times some my pronouns for him/her vary. Sorry if I confused anyone. Also the next chaptrer is in progress and will contain smut, and the confronation with william, only Umdertaker will be there to help Grell out. Stay tuned for the maddness that will insue.


End file.
